I don’t mind doing the dishes. Okay, let me rephrase that. I don’t mind doing the dishes when I didn’t work that day and I’m not tired to the point of desiring nothing more than to sit on the couch and stare blankly at the television. That’s really specific, right? And leaves two out of seven days of the week where I don’t mind doing the dishes.
At this point, Bear and I have been living together for two months. We moved in on May 23rd and have been settling ever since. I’ve heard from other friends who agree that when you’ve been in a relationship with someone for five to seven years (as Bear and I have, seven years in October) and you’re just now moving in together? It’s weird. This is a person you know better than anyone, who knows you better than anyone, and yet this is the first time you’ve had to share space on a permanent basis. It’s almost like being new to each other again, but you’re not. Like I said, it’s weird.
What’s also interesting about it is who picks up what duties around the house. It seems that sometimes, often in spite of ourselves, we fall into our gender roles without meaning to. My family has taken to giving me hell about not feeding Bear well enough. His mom, on the other hand, gave him the look when it came out that he hasn’t done the dishes that many times and that he hasn’t touched our new washer and dryer yet. It goes back and forth.
The surprising thing is that when I think about the day when I will be a fully paid, professional writer, working completely from home, I don’t mind the idea of becoming fully responsible for cooking and cleaning and laundry. I actually take a small bit of satisfaction in those things. I like cleaning the dishes and putting them neatly away in their proper place. Same with laundry. I enjoy cooking a good meal that the people I share it with enjoy. I’ve never been hard to please, and I’ve always tried to take joy in the simple things. So being a writer/homemaker? I could dig that kind of life. One thing I know for certain is that I’d like to be in that position when I start having kids. It just seems like that would make everything so much easier on Bear and myself if I’m not held down to the constraints of a 9-5 job.
A lot has changed this year already. It’s strange to think that we’re in the second half of the year, that 2014 is well on its way to being over. Through the ups and the downs, it’s one hell of a ride.